比如,中國(guó)人在餐廳或咖啡廳,會(huì)說(shuō):“我想要一個(gè)漢堡包”或者“我想要一杯咖啡”。但是,如果直接把這些話翻譯成英語(yǔ)“I want to have a hamburger.”或“I want to have a coffee.”老外們會(huì)覺(jué)得這樣說(shuō)話很沒(méi)有禮貌,當(dāng)然他們也不會(huì)直接告訴你。而在西方國(guó)家,老外們一般會(huì)說(shuō):“Could I have a hamburger, please?”或“Can I have a coffee, please?”在這里j又要提到一個(gè)需要注意的問(wèn)題,“打工的孩子最容易不注意的是see you.See u應(yīng)該是客人說(shuō)的,隱含了他覺(jué)得不錯(cuò)他會(huì)再來(lái)的意思,而店員最好用低調(diào)一點(diǎn)的bye,用see u太強(qiáng)勢(shì)了。另外人家說(shuō)謝謝,你也不用說(shuō)you are welcome, 這實(shí)在是太正式了,有點(diǎn)真把自己當(dāng)回事覺(jué)得幫了人家的味道;卮餭heers或no worries就好,如果僅僅是對(duì)方愛(ài)說(shuō)謝,你甚至可以不回應(yīng)他的謝,直接說(shuō)你要說(shuō)的就好,如果是買了他的東西他謝你,更不能說(shuō)you r welcome了,最好也謝對(duì)方”
再比如,中國(guó)人在拒絕別人邀請(qǐng)的午宴或晚宴時(shí),會(huì)說(shuō):“抱歉,我不能去,我還有別的安排。”翻譯成英文就是“Sorry,I can’t. I have another appointment.”如果這樣說(shuō),那別人第二次也許不會(huì)再邀請(qǐng)你了。老外們一般會(huì)這樣說(shuō):“That is a good idea! I would like to join in but I have another appointment today.”
我們可以從中總結(jié)一些“有禮貌”的技巧:
1、西方人(主要指有一定修養(yǎng)的歐美人)在與他人交流時(shí),比較多地使用情態(tài)動(dòng)詞:can、could、may、might、would等等;情態(tài)動(dòng)詞(Model Verbs)又稱為情態(tài)助動(dòng)詞(Model Auxil-iaries),表示說(shuō)話人的語(yǔ)氣,可表達(dá)建議、要求、可能和意愿等,使得說(shuō)話的語(yǔ)氣比較有禮貌。
2、比較多地使用虛擬語(yǔ)氣,比如would (had) rather、would (had) sooner、would (just) as soon等等,或者在陳述句中使用過(guò)去式表示虛擬語(yǔ)氣,或者使用if等引導(dǎo)的從句表示“可能性”。這樣說(shuō)話可以使人感覺(jué)表達(dá)者是在考慮達(dá)到最佳的結(jié)果或方式,盡量避免不好的結(jié)果或方式,或者推測(cè)可能出現(xiàn)的問(wèn)題,并找出可能解決的辦法。
3、往往在句尾加please,而不是在句首加please。當(dāng)please用在句首的時(shí)候,語(yǔ)氣聽(tīng)起來(lái)就比較強(qiáng),聽(tīng)起來(lái)像命令。比如請(qǐng)求別人做某事的時(shí)候,我們中國(guó)人會(huì)說(shuō)“請(qǐng)?jiān)谥芤磺敖o我回復(fù)。謝謝!钡侨绻阒苯佑糜⒄Z(yǔ)說(shuō)“Please reply to me by Monday. Thank you.”聽(tīng)者會(huì)覺(jué)得你是在命令他,一點(diǎn)禮貌也沒(méi)有。而如果這樣說(shuō):“Could you please reply to me by Monday? Thank you.”就顯得有禮貌了。
4、在陳述句的表達(dá)可能顯得生硬、沒(méi)禮貌時(shí),盡量使用疑問(wèn)句、否定句或從句,盡量避免自己的主觀判斷或武斷,以積極的、建議的、比較的、人性的語(yǔ)氣,代替消極的、命令的、直接的、武斷的語(yǔ)氣。
5、說(shuō)話要以他人為中心,以肯定他人、贊同他人為前提,讓自己顯得謙卑、渺小。說(shuō)完之后,還要附帶一句“Thank you”或“Thanks”。其實(shí),這種禮貌的表達(dá)方式是來(lái)自古老的中國(guó)。這是東西方文化的共同點(diǎn),也是為人處世的基本原則。了解英語(yǔ)中禮貌的表達(dá)方式,盡量讓自己的英語(yǔ)表達(dá)更有禮貌,融入社會(huì)。
說(shuō)到這里,我們索性再八一八英國(guó)人那些弱爆了的思維吧。
當(dāng)英國(guó)人夸你“很不錯(cuò)”時(shí),當(dāng)英國(guó)人“順便說(shuō)一句”時(shí),當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“基本同意”時(shí),他們想表達(dá)的實(shí)際含義是什么呢?而你又是如何理解的呢?千萬(wàn)不要誤會(huì)他們的意思,鬧出笑話!
When the British say "I hear what you say. " They mean "I disagree and do not want to discuss it further." But what others understand is "He accepts my point of view."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“我聽(tīng)到你所說(shuō)的了”時(shí),他們的意思是“我不同意也不想就其做進(jìn)一步討論”,而其他人卻理解成了“他接受了我的觀點(diǎn)”。
When the British say "With the greatest respect... " They mean "I think you are an idiot." But what others understand is "He is listening to me."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“出于最大的尊重…”時(shí),他們的意思是“我覺(jué)得你太二了”,而其他人卻理解成了“他正聽(tīng)我說(shuō)話呢”。
When the British say "That's not bad. " They mean "That's good." But what others understand is "That's poor."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“不算太糟”時(shí),他們的意思是“太好了”,而其他人卻理解成了“太差了”。
When the British say "That is a very brave proposal. " They mean "You are insane." But what others understand is "He thinks I have courage."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“那真是一個(gè)非常有勇氣的提議”時(shí),他們的意思是“你真是瘋了”,而其他人卻理解成了“他覺(jué)得我很有膽識(shí)”。
When the British say "Quite good. " They mean "A bit disappointing." But what others understand is "Quite good."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“很不錯(cuò)哦”時(shí),他們的意思是“有點(diǎn)小失望”,而其他人卻理解成了“真心不錯(cuò)”。
When the British say "I would suggest... " They mean "Do it or be prepared to justify yourself." But what others understand is "Think about the idea, but do what you like."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“我想建議的是……”時(shí),他們的意思是“去實(shí)踐或者做好準(zhǔn)備證明你自己”,而其他人卻理解成了“考慮一下他的點(diǎn)子,但還是做我想做的”。
When the British say "Oh, incidentally / by the way... " They mean "The primary purpose of our discussion is..." But what others understand is "That is not very important."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“順便說(shuō)一句……”時(shí),他們的意思是“我們討論的最根本目的是……”,而其他人卻理解成了“接下來(lái)的話不是非常重要”。
When the British say "I was a bit disappointed that... " They mean "I am annoyed that..." But what others understand is "It doesn't really matter."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“我對(duì)……有點(diǎn)小失望”時(shí),他們的意思是“我對(duì)……很惱火”,而其他人卻理解成了“無(wú)傷大雅”。
When the British say "Very interesting. " They mean "That is clearly nonsense." But what others understand is "They are impressed."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“非常有意思啊”時(shí),他們的意思是“那明顯是瞎扯淡”,而其他人卻理解成了“那真是讓人印象深刻”。
When the British say "I'll bear it in mind. " They mean "I've forgotten it already." But what others understand is "They will probably do it."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“我刻在腦子里了”時(shí),他們的意思是“我已經(jīng)不記得了”,而其他人卻理解成了“他們大概會(huì)去做的吧”。
When the British say "I'm sure it's my fault. " They mean "It's your fault." But what others understand is "Why do they think it was their fault?"
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“我確定是我錯(cuò)了”時(shí),他們的意思是“那其實(shí)是你的錯(cuò)”,而其他人卻理解成了“為什么他們會(huì)覺(jué)得是他們的錯(cuò)呢?”
When the British say "You must come for dinner. " They mean "It's not an invitation, I'm just being polite." But what others understand is "I will get an invitation soon."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“你一定要來(lái)赴宴”時(shí),他們的意思是“那絕不是什么邀請(qǐng),我只不過(guò)想禮貌一些”,而其他人卻理解成了“馬上我就會(huì)收到一個(gè)邀請(qǐng)了”。
When the British say "I almost agree. " They mean "I don't agree at all." But what others understand is "He's not far from agreement."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“我基本同意”時(shí),他們的意思是“我一點(diǎn)兒都不同意”,而其他人卻理解成了“他真的是非常非常同意啊”。
When the British say "I only have a few minor comments. " They mean "Please re-write completely." But what others understand is "He has found a few typos."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“我只是有一點(diǎn)兒建議”時(shí),他們的意思是“請(qǐng)從頭到尾地重寫(xiě)一份吧”,而其他人卻理解成了“他只不過(guò)發(fā)現(xiàn)了一些言語(yǔ)錯(cuò)誤”。
When the British say "Could we consider some other options?" They mean "I don't like your idea." But what others understand is "They have not yet decided."
當(dāng)英國(guó)人說(shuō)“我們可以再考慮一些其他的選擇嗎?”時(shí),他們的意思是“我著實(shí)不喜歡你的點(diǎn)子”,而其他人卻理解成了“他們還沒(méi)有決定下來(lái)吧”。